Making a Song: "Baptized"
How "Baptized" was written and recorded (with demo tracks, video & stems)
This one wasn’t easy.
I originally wrote Baptized and recorded an acoustic, folk version in April 2020. It was amongst the first songs I had ever written. With a beginner's mind. Before being occupied with how a song should be. So, it just was. That was three years ago, from home in Bozeman, while we were all yearning for connection.
Over the years and during the studio recording process, the song changed and evolved but always came back to its original point of view. It's about the power of words and the beautiful, terrifying vulnerability of trust. Maybe he, she or they is a lover, a friend, a teacher, a preacher...I won't say and you can decide. Either way, it's about falling backwards into someone's words and drowning in their arms. Intoxicated by another mind, soul or body. It's a beautiful thing but, as we all know, it doesn't always work out. We hurt. We learn. We heal. We move on and, like a scar that's hard to hide, it's now part of us.
I grew up in an Evangelical church and I've seen my share of water baptisms. Every Sunday morning a handful of people would come forward seeking redemption in the holy water. An act of faith for peace. I remember them in their Sunday best, falling backwards into the water. Seeking assurance for things hoped for and not seen.
I understand the appeal of redemption but that kind of faith has never been easy for me.
So, I was never baptized. At least not in that way. Instead, I choose to place my faith in love. Like a crow flies. No mind on the weather. Just holding a lucky feather. And, that vulnerability can feel like drowning.
Here’s a look behind-the-scenes on how we made Baptized - Chapter 3 of my Pretty Dopamine Bullets visual album:
Songwriting
For me, songwriting starts with words. Usually from handwritten notes in one of my journals. If an interesting theme or direction emerges I’ll search for a form and melody on an acoustic guitar. Baptized was no different. It came together as two rough poems or ideas. The first was written in 2020 and led to the final song lyrics (see video description) and the second (written much later in January 2023) entitled “You Were Water” inspired the visuals:
A Song Evolves
Baptized was produced and recorded with Enrique Gonzales Müller and Jake Fleming over a 7-month period from August 2022 to February 2023 in Bozeman, MT and West Newbury, MA. Seven months for four minutes. It was my first time learning to settle into the experimentation and perfecting phases of creating art instead of rushing to the finish line. The pretty dopamine bullet that comes with getting the thing done and sharing it with the world. This new level of caring and detail felt uncomfortable and beyond my ability much of the time. I was truly out of my depth but with faith that, through the work, I'd finally learn to tread water.
The studio recording process started with my home demo, some experimenting with key changes on an acoustic guitar, drums/bass/synths/vibes/atmosphere with Enrique, final lead vocals at home, background vocals and guitars at Jake Fleming’s studio in Bozeman and then back to Enrique for mixing and mastering.
STEP 1: Home Studio Demo (Bozeman, MT - September 2022) with scratch vocal and some initial synth, bass, drum, guitar, atmosphere ideas.
STEP 2: Finding the Right Key (Bozeman, MT - September 2022) via acoustic guitar experiments and iPhone voice memos.
STEP 3: Storyboarding (Boston, MA - October 2022) with Enrique as he helped identify an emotional arc for the song, instrumentation and specific sounds we would be trying to achieve during the recording process. We looked and listened to a lot for inspiration but got the most from tracks by Leonard Cohen, Massive Attack, Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Chris Isaak for this one (I know, strange combination). Ultimately, we were aiming for the feeling of being in an old American Gothic painting or Alfred Hitchcock film.
STEP 4: Finding & Recording Final Parts to achieve the emotional and sonic goals of the storyboard. Here are some of my favorite “stems” (aka final individual parts used to mix and master the track).
Water (produced by Enrique):
Ian Fleming-inspired Guitar (played by Enrique):
Whisper Vocal:
Main Guitar Riff (played by Jake):
And, how it all came together:
Stream or download everywhere else with this link.
Storytelling
I can't swim. I grew up in the mountains and deserts where water is scarce and easy to avoid. I've always been afraid of it. Especially the ocean. What I can't see. The undertow. The abyss. When I wrote Baptized and as we produced the track and created the visuals I kept coming back to capturing the sounds and feeling of sinking underwater - just out of reach of a savior and how there should be a warning left on the surface. A white flower. As a surrender...as a reminder...that you were water.
For the full Baptized Music & Picture Show click here.
For the love of music & pictures,
jkb